I Wish It Would Rain
by ayakayasha
Summary: "I wish it would rain." She said quietly, looking up toward the sky. "I fell like rain…" Sakura relives her past relationship, only to regret not being able to let it go...


I Wish it Would Rain

"I wish it would rain." She said quietly, looking up toward the sky. "I fell like rain…" The poor young girl was cursed, or rather plagued. You see, she had met someone a few years ago. He was a sweet boy, always there to ask what was wrong, to present her with gifts and to comfort her when needed…which was often.

The girl was hyper, happy and outgoing on the outside, but on the inside… she was like the rain. 'Exactly like the rain…' That's what she would always tell herself. She always felt like falling freely from the sky and leaving the rest of the world to its problems. She had had hers and wanted nothing to do with anyone else's…until that day.

_She was sitting with her friends, just talking and having a good time, but there was one person there that she didn't know. She had seen him once or twice before, going to and from classes, but had never bothered talking to him. Why would she…? Well after about an hour, the girl's friends had left for home, leaving her and the strange boy alone. The whole time she never really said anything to him, in fact, she didn't much bother to look at him_

_She didn't bother moving from the spot. She had nowhere else to go, and her ride wouldn't be there for at lest another halve hour. She still didn't look at him, but instead sat there shivering in the cold. It was in late fall, winter would come in just a few weeks, but she had neglected to bring a jacket with her, so she simply sat there in the cold._

"_Here, you look like you're freezing." She turned to see the boy handing her his jacket. She looked at him with a slightly confused look on her face for a moment. So she was cold, why did he care? They didn't even know each other, So why bother giving her his jacket? He would just get cold too. _

"_No thanks, I'm fine." Was all she told him, but the boy wouldn't give it up._

"_No, I insist. You're clearly freezing your ass off in this weather. Pulse you'll get sick if you don't get some thing on." She started to get slightly annoyed. _

"_No, I said I'm fine. Besides, what's keeping __you __from getting sick if you're not wearing a jacket?"_

"_Well for one, I've been wearing a jacket all day, so I think I can last a little while without it. Two, my body temp naturally stays high. And three, I'm wearing long sleeves, unlike you."_

"_Ok, well answer this. Why offer your jacket to a girl you don't even know?" _

"_Because it's something a gentleman does. I can't just sit here when there's a girl sitting in front of me freezing. Now just take the jacket."_

_She decided to give in and take the jacket from him. For a thin looking leather jacket, it was pretty warm. 'Probably because he just took it off, it's still warm from his body heat.' After taking the jacket, she simply continued to look off in the distance, ignoring the boy. Unfortunately, he wasn't done talking._

"_So, what did you say your name was?"_

_She simply looked at him, the lest amount of interest shone in her eyes. "…Sakura." _

"_I'm Sasuke, nice to meet you." He held out his hand, and she decided to shake it out of politeness. He gave her his jacket, the lest she could do was shake his hand right?_

Sakura continued to sit in her chair. She was visiting a relative down south, hoping to temporarily get rid of the current problems she had at home. It seemed she always had to deal with some kind of problem, some times the problem wasn't even her own. But no matter where she went, there was always something, and this trip was no exception.

It was a quarter to two in the morning when she sat there by herself. Every one else in the house had already went to bed at lest two hours earlier. It was near the end of her summer vacation, but she still wished for the absent rain. She had the feeling of wanting to stand out in the rain at this time of night. It would be perfect. Maybe it would wash away this old pain that she just couldn't abandon, no matter how hard she tried.

_It was a few days after she had met Sasuke, and they seemed to becoming good friends. He would often come up to her out of nowhere and spend the few hours she had after school to talk to her. In fact, there were days even, when his mom would come to get him, and he told her that he would walk home later, simply because he wanted to talk to Sakura some more. As friendly as she was at school, and with the rest of her friends, this was all new to her. She had never met anyone that took that much of an interest in her, or just simply wanted to be around her that often. It was unfamiliar, but enjoyable._

Sakura got on her uncle's laptop and checked her e-mail. She had sent her grandfather a message telling him about her problem and asking for advice. She could always ask him what to do whenever something was wrong. All he said in his reply, however, was the exact _opposite _of what she wanted to hear. With a sigh of frustration at herself for having the problem in the first place, rather than her grandfather's reply, she logged off her e-mail.

She sat there for a moment thinking of the past and how pathetic she was for holding onto what was long past. Her grandfather told her to try and call him, get in contact. She decided to look up his Myspace page, just to look at it. When she got there, she wasn't surprised to see the familiar style he had on there. A black background and angels with black wings, it looked like something he would use.

What was wrong with her? Why couldn't she get past this? She hadn't seen or even heard from him in at lest two years! Why couldn't she get him out of her head!

_They had finally decided to get together. After only a few weeks, they had become a near famous couple. If there was one of them, it was guaranteed that the other wasn't too far behind. They always laughed, and joked, and seemed happier than ever. Sure they had a few fights, same as any other couple, but they would always work things out. Once they got to know each other better they came to realize they neither of them was really the person they seemed to be around everyone else. Despite that, they knew they could always rely on each other when things got to be too much for them to handle alone._

It was nearly noon the next day, and Sakura felt terrible. She only managed to get about six hours of sleep. She was happy though that she didn't have another unwelcomed dream… The family was up and about, kids watching cartoons, her uncle's girlfriend, Tsunade, cooking and doing dishes, and her uncle in his room doing something, she didn't know what. The problem had been eating at her. She didn't want to eat, and seemed stressed. Tsunade had noticed and asked what was wrong. Ayaka had told her what had been plaguing her mind. Tsunade had guessed it was because Ayaka felt guilty. She wasn't sure, but whatever it was, she was getting sick and tired of it.

_Things were as great as ever. The couple were always together, and the whole school had agreed that they where almost perfect for each other. Almost… Sasuke had told Ayaka that he loved her. She had hesitated, but told him that she loved him back. After that, she never gave it a second thought, at lest, not till her friends had told her that she didn't show much interest in him anymore. _

'_What? What are they talking about? Of course I care about him, he's my boyfriend!' She looked over at him while he talked to a friend of his. He felt her gaze, looked over at her and smiled. She smiled back…but she started realizing that something was wrong, off. Before, if he had smiled she would be extremely happy. Now it seemed like a chore to show any kind of affection…_

She looked at the clock. It was past four in the afternoon. Her uncle and Tsunade had left to look for a new truck, leaving her alone with the kids. All she wanted to do was sit on the couch. She was tired of the computer, there was nothing good on TV, and she couldn't find anything good looking in the fridge. Not to mention that the kids were driving her crazy at the moment. All any of them wanted to do was wrestle with her and play a game of capture. Did I mention that she wasn't the best person with kids, and it didn't help that there was three of them, and only one of her… She sat there with a sigh, and could do nothing but wait for her uncle and Tsunade to come home. She leaned back and tried to relax.

_She started to think that she didn't love him anymore, maybe she never did. She was acting more distant lately, and started to feel like she didn't want to be seen with him anymore. They were getting in more fights lately, big fights. There was once or twice when they where just about to say that they wanted to break up, but solved their problems and made up like always. She had always regretted the fights. In her mind, they were fighting simply because of her. It was because of her conflicting and confusing thoughts and feelings. She cared about him, she knew she did. She would always tell herself that if something had ever happened to him, if he ever got hurt, or simply wasn't there anymore, she would break down. That was something that she wouldn't do for many people, in fact she could count the people she would cry for on her hand, but she would cry for him without a doubt. So why feel this way? Why cause all these problems?_

She survived the few hours on her own. The adults came home, no new truck, and starring at the huge mess Ayaka had let the kids make around the house. She had to relentlessly get up and help Tsunade clean the kitchen. After that Tsunade left for her first job at a local bar, and Ayaka helped her uncle work in the back yard. It was a quarter past nine when she finally came into the house, beat down and tired from the work she did.

'Sigh, a shoulder to lean on would be really nice right about now…' At that thought, she started to remember Sasuke again. 'Damn it! It's been TWO YEARS! I have got to be the most pathetic person alive to still be thinking about him. Especially when I was the one acting like a total bitch about everything! Sigh, I have to forget about him…'

_Sasuke was acting strange lately too. It seemed like he was trying his best to avoid Ayaka. She didn't push him; their relationship was on the rocks already. One morning he came up to her with a strange look on his face. He handed her a journal and told her not to read it till she got to class. Confused as to what was going on, she tried to flip through it, asking him what it was and what was going on. He grabbed her hand quickly, stopping her from seeing the contents of the journal. _

"_Just, don't read it till you get to class, ok…?" She was truly confused, but did what he asked anyway._

_It was first period, and she looked at the journal. She opened it to the first page and started to read. After about ten minutes, her stomach churned. She jumped from her seat and ran to the trash can. Luckily she was in art class, so people didn't really take much notice of her getting out of her seat. She stood there ready to puck. She had read the journal to find it full of Sasuke's erotic desires with her. She found it hard to breathe evenly. She was scared. No, she was terrified! Ayaka had never even thought about these kinds of things. She was so modest and kept to herself that she hadn't even kissed a boy yet, despite the fact that she was already in her first year of high school! What was she going to do? She didn't think she could even face him long enough to give him his journal back. If she couldn't even do that, then just how the hell was she going to talk to him about this? She couldn't just let something like this go! _

'_The journal!' she couldn't even force herself to read the rest of the pages, she immediately turned to the closest blank page and wrote the message in such a nerves scribble that you almost couldn't read it._

Ayaka had finished making dinner for the family, leaving leftovers for Tsunade, for when she got home. She then went to take a shower to get rid of all the dirt that covered her. When she got out, she just wanted to sit on the couch and veg out. He uncle had come up to her to thank her for all her help with everything like he usually did. He told her that he and Tsunade were seriously discussing having her move in with them. It was a loving gesture, and she would be happy to take them up on the offer, but she wasn't sure. How would they convince her father, who she just moved in with a year ago, to let her move in with them? If only they could convince him, then there would be no problem. She could explain to her friends that she changing locations again and it wasn't like she was leaving a boyfriend behind. She hadn't had one in nearly two years, not since that day.

_She had written a note, saying that she couldn't do it anymore, that she needed to break up. She papercliped the message and gave the journal to a friend, telling them to return it to him. By third period, he had her pulled out of class to talk. They had spent ten minutes discussing things and crying. They had broken up. It wasn't long before that wasn't good enough for her. She avoided him, hated him. She had wanted nothing to do with him and decided to cut off all ties. He graduated and moved out of state to be in the army. She entered her second year and moved to her father's. Once he tried to add her to his friends list on his Myspace. She refused and blocked him, saying only one word to him _

'…Sorry.'_ After that, the two never spoke again._

She sat at the laptop, listening to one of her favorite songs, My December, by Linkin Park. Tsunade had just come home two and a halve hours early form her first job. Her and Sakura's uncle were playing and laughing with the oldest child, all the other children where already in bed. Sakura looked at the clock on the laptop to see that it was a quarter past one in the morning. Out of every thing she thought and felt those years ago, she could never really let the boy go. She still missed him to this day. She sat there at the computer thinking of her past with him, and her present without him.

"I wish it would rain. I feel like rain. If I could just be the rain, trade places with it, I could fall freely and not have to worry about any of this. I could just wash everything way and I could be washed away…"

She truly is a pathetic girl.


End file.
